He spends about 80 hours a week at the hospital. Think about what you want in a relationship. This is the type of doctrine that Joseph rejected and so have the leaders of the church. I thought I could do it, but the isolation, loneliness, and depression are much worse than I expected. And of course we have been taughtвby Brigham Young, at leastвthat even when Christ comes during the Millenium there will be those who will not accept him as their Savior even if they accept him as the leader of the world. Go for the joy, the experiences, the children to come. Religious differences, however are real. I can see why people get a divorce when their kids get older. I completely relate to all you've written; many of us have come to see Mormonism for what it is, and the severe damage it does to human brains. Are there things you've had to compromise on to mutually make it work.
I feel you on the loneliness. Single women who are educated, regardless of religion, are also going to find similar gender imbalances among their educated peers nowadays. It isn't money that he is just throwing around on useless things, its for dinner movies normal date stuff that people do over a course of a month and we cram into one weekend.
I have been married to a doc for 31 years and just found out about an "emotional affair" that went on for 15 years she is a nurse. I know, I know, this is the last thing you want to hear. They are grown now and serving their country but luckily they still need Mom and Dad sometimes!. Second, in my experience mormons have been some of the kindest people I've ever had the privilege to know, and they have not lived up to the cult image you describe. I say, Follow your heart. All I can recommend, as a docs wife of nearly 30 years, is prayer or to book a few sessions with a psychologist. Being married to a doctor is a difficult thing to balance. Also, I'm not involved with a doctor but I am an RN and spend quite a bit of time with them. You are atheist and that's not changing. Dude just to summarize what I think is the majority of the comments.
My husband gives the very best of himself to the hospital and the staff and patients every day. His father died and he was not given one day off. If my mother needed her surgeon's attention, I wouldn't want him to be thinking about his wife's lamenting that he's never home, not romantic, etc. I've been the main parent for 30 years. I would rather being with a man who makes less and is faithful but that is just me!. And right at that moment when I'm about to tell him this, and give him some kind of ultimatum, I hesitate. My surgeon husband of 12 years just made himself a "free agent" when he cheated on me and our three kids with a gal 12 years his junior. I married a NOMO after a lengthy temple marriage and divorce. There is no moral issue here.