I just pray that we can make it through the next 3 years. A good place to go is to a museum, hiking, or to a park. It's not fair to put words in her mouth and thoughts in her brain like this. When missionaries come home, they are like top dog religious people. My husband, regardless of religious affiliation, is a beloved son of our Heavenly Father who is very much worthy of my love, affection and dedication. We get along exceptionally well and I really like him though, so I can see this going somewhere. But wait a minute. He is in a way to become a Ex mormon. But now, we embrace our spiritual differences.
And you are right about people telling you that you are lucky that you married a doctor and should not complain. When he doesn't have his patience he has his family who seem more and more to have self inflicted issues they gamble, drink and smoke which lead to health issues and bills. Would they have stayed in the church if dad was a member. I believe that we are all on different paths, but that it is possible for us to travel on different paths side-by-side. There are many good things. It does not come from common religion or personality or even values; it only comes through mutual self transcendence. I am as ambitious as he and he supports that. I think the most important thing is to bring up the issues as questions rather than points as why she's wrong.
Take the missionary lessons, read the Book of Mormon and the Bible. If you can't, then it's best to move on. You can ask her directly, or through sources like other Mormons or reading their books. I know I am a strong person but it really does suck sometimes. Catholics basically married catholics and protestants basically married protestants. I don't mind long hour days but not having a companion during weekends. But the issue of marrying a non-member raises two fundamental problems: That idea seems so contrary to the nature of God. Topics like race and polygamy have been "adequately" explained away, so I don't think we'd get anywhere discussing those things. You are a good person.
I don't want to stress him. I understand the sacrifice that it takes to become a doctor, but I am not sure if he does. When my husband and I were sealed, I finally understood why my Dad had been stressing this to me my entire life. And what is even worse, is to think of him alone in our house Christmas Day while I work a 24 hr in-house call shift. There are two ways to go about this. He will eventually have more time for you, but right now he is likely giving you all the time that he can, even though it is very little. You have been blessed with the equipment to make such decisions. This is a very delicate territory, so tread carefully.